100 days of Gratitude/Happiness: Day 7

Big idea. Happy smart girl with glasses and solution lightbulb above head. Solving a problem creative idea concept

“As soon as you start to pursue a dream, your life wakes up and everything has meaning.” — Barbara Sher

Happiness:

Take 3 months off of taking new web clients, and build a mock side from underscores to add to my portfolio.

Start Date: Oct 1, 2015
End Date: Dec 31, 2015

Plan of Action:

Objective:
To better my Front End Development Skills, I am spending the next 3 months making and breaking a WordPress Mock Site using underscores.

Tasks:

Planing:
Muse for the Site
Questionnaire: Screening, Intake, Follow up

Design:
Content Strategy
Style Tiles
wireframe

Build:
Development
Testing
Launch

Success Criteria:
Meeting my time Frame.

Time Frame:
2 weeks on the first two phases max, and two months on the latter.

100 days of Gratitude/Happiness: Day 6

Writing down new plans

Gratitude

  • Got a plan laid out for the next 3 months. When I get a printer, I’ll print it out to keep on track.
  • My friend for getting me out of the house for our monthly doughnut run, that I forgot we didn’t do this month cause she been MIA.
  • I saw my stomach in a positive matter, which hadn’t happen in years. There is a lot of work to get it back to heathy. Baby steps.
  • Alhambra Gardens Cafe
  • Completed anther day.

100 days of Gratitude/Happiness: Day 4

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Gratitude

  •  My extend WordPress family and friends. I am eternality grateful for them, and grace of the WordPress community. 
  • Being coming a Developer. My hugest fear happen on using that title happen today,  I was told not to used the word Developer in my title today by somebody who I just meet and knew nothing about me.  It took a lot of convincing by people I knew, and respected as developers that have seen my code and work, to convince me to start using that title about a year ago.  I understand and respect that person’s POV of what a Developer is and why, because that was my stander for a long time till people talk to me about it.
    I know it’s a very controversial topic on what titles are but I also realize that I need stop fearing the reactions of voicing my opinions.  For me at this point of my life,  if you do anything that is constantly consider Development, you are a Developer. It doesn’t mean that you are great at it, but everybody has to start somewhere. I don’t charge as a Developer or a Designer but when I get to the level that I feel I can start charging for it,  I will. Now to getting back on track on leveling up. 
  • Taking the next 3 months to build a mock site of things I want to learn. I’m not taking on any more new website clients for the rest of the year and just build a mock site to up my level. The talk I had with that person today made me realize that I’m only taking on paid clients is because that’s what I think should doing. I’ve been building the same configuration sites for over 1.5 years now because that’s all they can afford. I’ve been very very bored and not using the skills I’ve learned,  but I do want to help people get started with their own site. This is a side job for me, it’s not my main income yet.  I can afford to take the next 3 months off, and just make a mock site of things I want to learn to make.
  • For the people I met at WCLAX. I wasn’t really planing on staying very long at WCLAX but after meeting some wonderful people, I did. Had wonderful talks with people. The last person’s conversation when very deep and it help me realize how to approach some blocks I’ve been stuck on for a while.

 

  •  Being able to get  4am breakfast burrito from a taco stand. I miss having this when I lived in Hawaii for 7 years.

 

100 days of Gratitude/Happiness: Day 3

Happiness

Had  a good day that turned into a busier day then planed.  Go to spend the morning with being inspired by the WordPress community, and what I love, learning about development and code.  Then dashed off to my sewing class. After class, I got to celebrate my friends’ accomplishment of completely remodeled their new home and their rental units at their house warming party.  Spend the late night at an very last min impromptu cheering up an old friend, I haven’t seen in a while, playing CAH. Only had some minor anxiety but it was mainly a good day.

100 days of Gratitude/Happiness: Day 2

 

notepad with pen on brown wood table background

Gratitude

  • My friends.
  • WordCamp LAX dinner. Meet some wonderful new people and reconnect with some old ones. I am glad that got over my anxiety today and when.
  • I applied last min to WC Sacramento. Don’t expect to get picked but I shared an idea that I had for a talk I would love to give one day. Think I will write it out and present it to a Meetup anyways and also revisit my 10 life lessons I learn learning WP.
  • That I got a thank you gift bag from WCLAX.
  • I got through anther day.

100 days of Gratitude/Happiness: Day 1

Thinking young woman with yes or no choice on grey background.

If my calculations are right, this should end on the first day of 2016.  Going to toggle between writing 5 things of Gratitude or sharing something that bought me Happiness during the 100 days, no matter how bad the day was.

Today I start with Gratitude:

  • Realizing in 100 days it will be a new year, on the drive to my doctor’s office. I have 100 days to create my life the way I want it for 2016. Decide to restart my 100 days of gratitude journal. When I got home, my friend posted if anybody want to join her for 100 days of happiness challenge for the rest of the year.  Decide to make it 100 days of gratitude or happiness instead. Welcome to my journey to shift my life.
  • Deciding to go back to school for a graphic design certificate. I might not finish the certificate but taking classes towards it. Am cutting back down on my spending, so I can get a pt job or an internship during the week to gain more experience. This would mean that I’m stepping out of the WordCamp/Press for a while, because most of my classes will be on the weekends.
  • Going to my weekly Pilates class even when I was depressed. Felt a lot better after class and spend an hour with great classmates and teacher.
  • Figure out a rolling technique to roll out my plantar fasciitis in my foot. Hurts, but I think I finally am able to start breaking up the tissues in the foot and stretch it. Feeling hopeful but it’s a long road to recovery.
  • Really enjoy listening to the book Big Magic: Creative Living Beyond Fear by Elizabeth Gilbert. It’s giving me a lot of inspiration to take back my creative life. I realize that I’ve also been suppressing my create side for the past few years. Need to just create/make/do stuff.

 

I forgive myself for:

content

  • trying to live up to other people’s expectations, instead of living up to mines.
  • putting the needs of other’s in front of mines and not taking care of myself.
  • letting fear rule me.
  • having imposter syndrome, and not patting myself on the back for all my amazing accomplishments.
  • not allowing me to be human when I make a mistakes. I allow everybody to make mistakes but me.
  • getting caught up in drama, because I care about the people involved.
  • not allowing my heart to fall in love in fear of being hurt.
  • allowing my father and his estate issues to rob me of over 1.5 years of my life and has take it’s toll on me, that I almost had a break down recently.

Need to keep on adding to list but this is a start.

 

 

The strongest women are often the weakest at heart…

Female hand holding heart shaped cup of coffee drinking, unusual high angle view

It’s funny how one simple lie from one person that I trusted dearly, can be the last straw that breaks me. Keep on telling myself suck it up, Buttercup but it’s not working. I know how to survive, and people mistake that for a strong heart but it is really so fragile from all the fractures. The only thing distracting me is work right now. Being more productive these days between the tears. Keeping low, and busy with my coding lessons while rebuilding two sites.

Looking forward to a cup of tea tonight as I’m listening to the rain. Am blessed that I enjoy what I am doing, learning, and eyeing.  Think I am going to start applying to speak to WordCamps, once I figure out what I have learned that is of value to other people.  Just because some people I deeply value, devalues me repeatedly,  I have to remind myself can still offer value to others and just grow forward.

Sharing old roommate war stories…

I was talking to my friend’s kid, man I feel old for saying that,  a few weeks ago about my college roommate experiences, which wasn’t bad compared to other people’s horror stories. Partly because I was almost never home because I helped run and held office in 2 college school clubs, which dealing with 100-200 people in each club, as I worked and when to college full time.

Most of my experience where good. Told her to have a roommate contract, a monthly amount for things you need to buy for the unit, and how you guys will divided up for chores, was the best way to go. Communicate, communicate, communicate, and communicate.  You guys were all raised different, with different values and ideas now living together for a year. I’ve learned and grown up so much with my roommates and great adventures with them. My bad weren’t crazy bad stories.

When I was in the dorms my freshman year, we had a two bedroom apartment with two roommates in each room.  One roommate in the other room, lived like ten min from the school and only got a room because it was paid for.  She came in when nobody was there and put her sheets on, then we didn’t meet her till a month later.  It sort of freak us out a little bit, because she had the same black sheets with the cult in SD that did a mass suicide but it turns out that was her older brother’s old college bed sheets.

She told her roommate, who was a very privilege OC girl, that she shopped lifted once when she was younger for fun. So her roommate overrated and cleared out her stuff, then demand to move rooms. She would only sleep there if she wasn’t there, and then slept in other people’s dorms. I had a class with her and I told her that we all know she hid all her stuff in the closet in the living room.  She freaked out and kept on causing so much drama. Was so glad she moved, and I was able to move in my other friend to replace her.

That friend that replaced the OC roommate, was from Hawai’i and from an all girls school. I didn’t realize how spoiled she was. When she came to my mother’s house, she came two hours late, then walk in without stopping going to my mother’ fridge and helped her self to food. I was so shocked. She asked my roommate to use her car to buy a loaf of bread. She had her friend over with her, and they didn’t come back for 6 hours because after getting bread they drove across LA to USC for a party for her to chase after a guy. She did’t even refill the tank after all that.

Living off campus after my freshman year, I had a roommate for a one year leave that didn’t get me a 30 day notice because she thought the lease end and decide that I can keep her part of security deposit instead of paying me her last month of rent.  After she moved out, she knew I wasn’t home during the weekend, and came back staying there during the weekend. The apartment manager caught her a month later, and I had to pay to change the locks on top of everything.

The summer before she moved out,  she decide to save money by renting out our living room. She told me that her friend need a place to crash for a month during summer school, which tuned into 2 months. I didn’t realize that she rent it out. This “friend” of her’s also set the pot on fire and I had to put it out. Lucky the apartment manager caught on and gave us a notice that she couldn’t stay with us anymore because she wasn’t on the lease.

I had anther roommate that replaced her, that had a “rich” boyfriend that sort of moved in. He lived in NYC and was going to NYU, some how he came to visit her during the summer for a month, that end up for 3 months. I kept on asking her why isn’t he going back to NYC, she didn’t know why he was still there either. What was awarded is we had a one bedroom, so they slept in the living room. It was never clear why he was still there when the fall semester started but my feeling is that he was kicked out of school because he never when back.

There were a few more stories but it wasn’t anything major. A lot of things is communication and nip it before it becomes drama. It’s something you need to learn to do with practice, practice, practice, like everything in life.