Be kind to yourself…

beautiful young girl in little room. creative concept

Until you take care of your health, there is nothing alas you can do for others or your work. These past few years has been a challenge that I didn’t work a traditional 9-5 job. I prided myself on being the best hire gun I could be for my bosses. It was part of who I was, and walking away from that to put the needs of my family first, has been a mental challenge.

Came into WordPress as a hobby, which turned into a side job, that lead me into wanting to go into it full time. That is the road now that I am working on and I know it will take a few years.  When it was a side job, I was freelance and I sub contracted also but I was ashamed that I wasn’t progressing very far.  It was because I was tried, very tried because I was taking care of things for my family and wasn’t taking care of my own health.

Two years plus ago, when situations with my family when to total chaos after my then recent ankle surgery, I’ve been pretty hard on myself for not progressing very far on my coding.  Have to stop and pat myself on the back, I did the best I could, and I’m still here trying.  Never stopped because this is no longer just a hobby but it’s a passion. Need to stop hiding my code. People will laugh, and judged, but you know, what I have git and I will improve. Not only do I have to improve my mental health but my physical health.

Just weighted myself, I dropped 9.6 pounds since the beginning of the year. I would like to lose 6.4 pounds by my Bday, so I need to start working out (baby steps), and making a meal plan on what I eat. If I don’t, I will not cry over it, just keep on working on it. Ideally, after reaching that goal, I would like to drop anther 30 pounds to reach my pre ankle surgery weight. If it takes anther year, I don’t care as long as I do it healthy and correctly.  Have to keep the same mental status with my coding.

Some people told me it’s the hands of God/Fate/Universe that holds you back till it’s your time. I’m just going to sit here and fine tune my craft, my code, my body, my health, my mind till the path I create is being built. It’s never going to be prefect, but it’s my own path and I’m going to be walking it as I’m building it. There will be mistakes, but as long as I learn from them and don’t stop trying, that’s all the matters at the end.  People will judge, but that also means they are stopping to notice what you are doing.  If they aren’t stopping to help me improve, they are not important to me, and not part of my tribe I’m building a long the way.

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